Loving First

Everyone knows someone who is easy to love, right?

But have you ever wondered why? What is it about them?

I did. I wondered about it A LOT. I used to think people like that were unicorns. They were a mystery. I decided that those magical people fell straight from heaven. I didn’t understand them, that much I knew. Personally, I spent much of my life being suspicious of new friends and new people in general. It felt like a way to protect myself—from what, though, I am still not sure.

We moved to Southern California when my oldest daughter was just six months old, and made some dear friends. I felt like we won the friend lottery. Everyone wanted to be friends with these two couples. They truly were the best. Almost instantly, they loved my daughter. I watched in awe as these friends of ours doted on her, loving her and cheering her on like she was their own. Our friends celebrated her birthdays, milestones, and holidays. They all loved Samantha, and I learned so much about who I wanted to be from them.

Years later, we lived in Texas with a lot more kids. I found another unicorn—one of these people who everyone loved. And I mean everyone. Specifically, I noticed how this particular woman loved my daughter, who was in a very awkward and sometimes obnoxious stage. She even dropped off a birthday present at 5 in the morning so she could catch Samantha before she left for school that day. It was an incredible thing to see.

For the first time, instead of simple being in awe of these people, I paid close attention to the “unicorns” in my life. What was their secret? Why were people drawn to them like moths to a flame?

Then I had an “AHA!” moment. There was no mystery here. The unicorns?—they truly loved people. ALL of them. Even the skinky, ugly, awkward, rude, you-make-me-want-to-punch-your-lights-out people. And they didn’t wait. Easy to love people love first.

These people make a decision to love everyone ahead of time.

Think of that.

You can decide before you go to an event that you are going to love everyone there. You can decide to love whomever your children choose to marry. Right now…even before they have a significant other. You can decide to love your teacher before you’ve ever stepped into the classroom.

Loving first may not come naturally to you, but you can learn to do it.

Be a person who loves first.

It’s not magic. These people aren’t unicorns. They simply love first.

You can do it, too.

Let’s go.