Decisions

In the spring of 2010, Brian and I were in the middle of making a huge decision—where he should take a job.

He had interviewed in several places, and there were good things about each of them. As we discussed what would be the best for his career and what we both wanted, we decided to take a job opportunity in Utah. I was so excited! My family was nearby, and so were some of his siblings. It was perfect!

We both felt really good about our decision.

The day he was scheduled to sign the contract arrived. Everything was working out even better than I imagined. I couldn’t wait for Brian to get back home and tell me all about it.

Well, he called instead, and the news was devastating.

“They pulled the job.”

What? I must have misheard him.

“There is no job, Holly! They decided to not go forward. There is no contract to sign.”

My jaw dropped, as did all my dreams of Sunday dinners with family, BYU games, skiing and sledding, and any hope of a white Christmas.

I didn’t know what to say. Brian said he’d be home soon and we would talk about it more.

What were we going to do? My whole world was crashing down around me, and I was distraught. Clearly, we had made the wrong decision!

Or had we?

Over the last 13 years, I have had a lot of time to think about decisions in general, and our specific one to stay in Utah for work. Although it appears to be so, it wasn’t the wrong one. Our decision was sound, and we were happy about it. But our circumstances changed in an instant. That happens all the time…and it doesn’t mean that your decision was a bad one. But it does mean that you may suddenly have to make more decisions you weren’t anticipating.

I have found that so many of the people I coach struggle with making decisions. The reason? They think there is a best choice, and the possibility that you choose wrong is paralyzing.

So they waffle back and forth…back and forth…back and forth. No decision is made, right?

Not exactly.

Spending your time in confusion, never committing to one thing or the other—it is still making a decision, just not the one you thought you were making. Instead of picking one direction and moving forward in it, you stagnate and delay. You procrastinate. You tread water, metaphorically.

THAT is your decision.

Decision-making is an important skill, and one that you will use your entire life. Stop telling yourself that there is always a best decision, and you have to find it.

You don’t.

You decide on one thing, and if it falls through, you get to make more decisions. Interestingly, the new choices only appear because of the first choice that didn’t pan out. Don’t be scared. Decide what to do, move forward, and keep on trucking along.

When Brian came home that night in 2010, we were feeling so sad and disappointed. But now we had different choices in front of us. Texas was our second choice, and we moved in that direction.

And the rest is history.