True Beauty

It was mid-February, and I was in constant pain. My shoulder was in the process of freezing (adhesive capsulitis), and everything around it hurt.

I was sleeping terribly, up every couple of hours because of the pain. I had a hard time getting dressed, so I was often sporting the same baggy sweatshirt day after day. I couldn’t get my arm above my head, so I struggled to wash my hair. Even lifting my hand to put on mascara made my shoulder scream.

Still, life was moving on. I had places I needed to be and things that had to be done.

I felt ugly. UGLY. I knew I looked bad, but I could not handle the pain required to get it together.

Every Wednesday I had a morning commitment. On this particular day, I knew how ugly I looked. I was counting down the hours til I could go back home and crawl into my bed.

The end time arrived, and I started to walk out. A woman I didn’t know came up to me and said,

“You are so beautiful.”

I was taken aback and chuckled as I responded with a thank you. Who was this weirdo?

“No, I mean it. I’ve been staring at your face and you are just gorgeous!”

This time, she had tears in her eyes as she told me. I mumbled a quick thanks and left.

That was so weird.

But I couldn’t stop thinking about our exchange. I thought about it on the drive home and the rest of the day. I even texted Brian what this random woman had said to me. Although I didn’t want to admit it, her words were so kind and sincere, and they came at a time when I needed them so much.

The woman’s words stayed with me the whole week. I had a hard time thinking of anything else. Why would she say that? What was she seeing? I couldn’t answer those questions, but I knew that I felt better that week. My physical pain was the same, but my heart was lighter. I was so grateful.

The next week came, and I saw the same woman. This time, I approached her to let her know how much I appreciated what she said to me. I explained all about my shoulder and my very restricted movements and how ugly I felt. Her kindness was an emotional buoy during a time when I was wallowing in my own misery and self-pity. She responded,

“I also wanted to explain something. I had been praying to see people as God sees them, and last week—I saw you. It was an answer to my prayer.”

Wow.

I’ve continued to think and ponder about this experience. Whether you believe in God, a higher power, or nothing at all, it doesn’t really matter. This woman looked beyond my physical appearance, without judgment, and saw something beautiful. Isn’t that the goal? And if it isn’t—shouldn’t it be?

When this happened I was so wrapped up in my own pity party that I hardly noticed anyone else. It was all me, all the time. My pain, my shoulder, my poor sleep, my everything. Me, me, and me! Her words were a reminder that my focus needed to turn outward.

True beauty doesn’t come from a concealer you wear or a bronzer you don’t. Because I believe in God, I think we are all His children. There is inherent worth and beauty that exists in every human on the earth. I’m just really glad that woman took the time to remind me of that truth on a cold day in February.

And now I’m reminding you.