Not enough sparkle

I was in a beauty pageant once.

I didn’t win, but I did come pretty close. However, I learned something back in 1993 that I have never forgotten. As I spent my last weekend at a dance competition, I was reminded of that lesson.

There isn’t enough sparkle to cover ugliness on the inside.

Thirty years ago, I watched one girl target another participant…a girl who didn’t seem likely to win…and tell her she should drop out of the contest because she had no chance of winning. 😳 This was not her only exhibition of ugliness. She had quite a few words for many of the other girls. I distinctly remember thinking then that no amount of awards, applause, or sparkle on her dress could mask her despicable behavior—at least not for those of us who knew how she actually behaved.

Fast forwarding to last weekend, I sat in the audience and watched a young woman walk on stage to perform her solo. Her costume was as sparkly and glittery as they come. She was practically glowing. But when the music began, her lack of ability and technique took center stage. The sparkle just couldn’t cover up her actual skill, or the lack of it. To be fair, there was nothing ugly about this girl. She was obviously doing her best. But even as she danced in all that sparkle, my mind went back to the beauty pageant.

Is the lesson I learned so long ago still true?

YES!!

But do you really believe it?

Maybe you should take a minute and think.

People are infatuated with success. Fame, popularity, wealth, accolades, awards of every kind, and everything that sparkles—this is truly what matters anymore. Who cares about character?? We want RESULTS! (Cue Violet Beauregarde’s mother in 2005 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory😩). Ugliness on the inside is heralded as the currency for ultimate accomplishment.

Gag.

Don’t fall for such lies.

True beauty starts on the inside, and travels outward. It has always been this way, but the world’s obsession with outward everything has left some of us acting confused. And weak.

What is to be done?

For one thing, stop excusing the mean and ugly behavior we see in our children and others. If you have children or work with children, you signed up to teach and correct and lead by example. An array of awards for any kind of outward success is NOT evidence of a kind person. However, good character is—and we all know that few awards are given for that. Teach them anyway. It is NOT old-fashioned. It is NOT out-of-date. And it is NOT too late.

Let’s celebrate fun accomplishments! Woo-hoo! But can we keep them in perspective? The world may be absolutely in love with outward successes, but we don’t have to be. Instead, we can love and celebrate good character at least as much as all the other stuff. Let’s do that, okay?

Finally, stop bedazzling ourselves, our kids, and whatever else in the hopes that we can hide the ugliness that is on the inside. Believe me, it never works.

There’s just never enough sparkle.